Recently, there has been a lot of controversy on the Internet about the inclusion of homosexuality as a mental disorder in college textbooks.
An article said that the international medical and psychological circles generally believe that homosexuality is not a disease, not a mental disorder, nor is it a subjective choice that can be voluntarily changed.
There are also comments that homosexuality violates science and ethics, is an accident, and cannot be regarded as the norm.
In my work circle, there are many gay colleagues and friends, and the relationship is relatively harmonious.
Homosexuals do not hinder others, and they have the right to love freely. Just like ordinary people, they need to be recognized by society.
But on the other hand, I have also witnessed the living conditions of gay friends around me. Due to various reasons, there are actually very few people who are really happy, so I don’t want more people to become gay.
1. Is homosexuality innate or acquired?
As for whether homosexuality is a natural or acquired factor, Southern Weekly published an article in 2019 to explain that there is no congenital gene, so the influence of acquired is relatively large.
In the well-known movie “Farewell My Concubine”, Xiaodouzi’s sexual orientation changed in her growing environment.
The young Xiaodouzi had a concept of gender at first. When he sang “I am a girl, I am not a man”, he repeatedly sang “I am a man, not a girl” . In his consciousness, he is a man.
For this reason, Xiaodouzi’s throat was almost smashed by the master before he finally sang the lines correctly. And his senior brother’s care and protection for him also made him rely on him. In the cold world, he felt that he was the concubine Yu and his senior brother was the overlord.
What really changed his cognition was that after he was molested by the eunuch Eunuch Li, Eunuch Li made him popular and made him regard himself as a woman from then on.
If there is no influence of the environment, Xiaodouzi should be like his senior brother, marry a wife and have children, and barely survive in the troubled times.
In reality,Many homosexuals have been traumatized to varying degrees in the process of growing up like Xiaodouzi, leading to changes in sexual orientation.
For example, a divorced family, a single mother with a son, the child lacks fatherly love and becomes dependent on men since childhood, and the parents care too little for the child, which makes them extremely prone to self-consciousness when they get emotional satisfaction from other same-sex known changes.
There is also a shift in emotional needs after adulthood like Leslie Cheung, and he becomes gay.
If the existence of homosexuality is not regarded as a psychological disorder, it can only be understood that all love is produced because of the emotional needs of both parties, and this aspect is the same.
San Mao said: Love is like the Zen of Buddhism—not clear.
Understanding everyone’s emotional needs, whether it is natural or acquired, as long as he can feel the happiness and joy of love, we should not reject it because it is same-sex love. This may be why most people don’t Reasons against homosexuality.
2. The living conditions of homosexuals
According to incomplete statistics, there are about 40 million homosexuals in China, and the hidden ones account for about 3%-4%. They are mainly distributed in a few developed cities with a high degree of acceptance, so they are rarely in their hometowns In life, most of them choose to wander outside and live in no fixed place.
No matter which city they are in, people still have a lot of strange views on homosexuality, so they are very sensitive, and most of them are unwilling to make it public or even admit it.
Of course, there are also some people with strong psychological endurance, who don’t want others to speak behind their backs, and will take the initiative to disclose it.
I have a male colleague with strong working ability, fluent English, and a very cheerful and lively personality.
People who deal with him for the first time can tell that he is gay, and he doesn’t shy away from it at all. He often raises his orchid fingers, puts his arms around female colleagues and calls them sisters, and goes to gay club parties every weekend. I have had many boyfriends, most of whom are foreigners.
In his circle of friends, he likes to post the daily life of gathering with friends and being in love with his boyfriend. He looks very sunny and happy.
he once told me, his parents divorced since he was a child, and he suffered a lot with his mother. When he was a child, he often saw his mother sad and crying alone, which made him a little fragile. The optimistic appearance is to let everyone better accept himself.
Relatives in the traditional rural hometown often call him an unfilial son, and never give up the idea of urging him to change.
Sometimes I feel very sorry for him, but I can’t help him much. I can only give him some care and encouragement in life. I would like to appeal to everyone not to discriminate against homosexuals. They are already under great pressure from their families.
Most of them are sensitive and lonely, low self-esteem but strong, and have strong self-esteem. They rarely discuss emotional topics with other people in life, and only seek warmth in their own circle. , It is inevitable that fish and dragons are mixed.
Compared to a population of 1.4 billion, 40 million people are a minority. In terms of human rights, they also have equal rights to love life. The society should protect the freedom of everyone’s love life. If you have a gay friend around you, please treat him sincerely.
3. The impact of homosexuality on society
I don’t advocate homosexuality because it has some impact on society.
Many homosexuals pass on the family line by finding a suitable heterosexual to marry and have a child. Firstly, there is an explanation to the family, and secondly, there is spiritual sustenance.
This method is difficult to implement, so there are some cases of gay marriage fraud in the society, and the harm to the cheated marriage partner is very serious.
Secondly, it is also unfair to the child. It is fine if the child is well taken care of after birth. If the child does not receive complete love, it will also have a bad impact on the child’s growth.
In addition, because of conservativeness, domestic homosexuality data is lower than that of the open West, but due to emotional cravings, many people are being “bent”.
In an increasingly open sexual culture, more and more heterosexuals are affected to become homosexuals, while very few homosexuals become heterosexuals.
A 23-year-old girl I know, Kobayashi, was disheartened and single after meeting a scumbag in several relationships.
Last year, a female leader came to her company. She liked her very much.She was not very good at working, and she took an important position. Xiao Lin attended many important occasions with the leader, and his admiration for the leader was beyond words.
The leader also took care of her in every possible way, taking her wherever she went. Over time, the two of them got better, and they simply moved in together.
This year, the leader’s term expires and he will leave the city. Xiaolin can’t do without her anymore, and follows the female leader regardless of his parents’ objections.
Since then, there has been another family full of contradictions, and there are many such stories. We agree that these are already there, but I don’t want more people to be gay.
The social atmosphere is open and gives people more freedom, which is the result of the development of civilization. Regardless of whether you are gay or heterosexual, you should boldly pursue your own happiness according to your inner feelings, but don’t change other people’s sexual orientation easily, unless you can be responsible for her life and make her live a happier life.
4. It is my attitude not to discriminate or advocate.
The United Nations claims that in the Asia-Pacific region, including China, sexual minorities are often one of the most marginalized and vulnerable groups in society.
It can be seen that under the traditional culture, the social environment of the huge homosexual group is very difficult.
However, since ancient times, there have been “broken sleeves” and “divided peaches”. The history of homosexual love has a long history. Human beings have different needs for emotions. I hope the society will be more tolerant and accept them, and avoid discrimination and prejudice.
It is recommended to reduce homosexuality at the source. All families should not only care about learning for their children. Cognition and concepts are very important during the growth process. I hope that both parents can give full love and companionship, teaching and guidance.
Incomplete families and missing love, filled with all kinds of people in society that do not match book knowledge, can easily make children’s cognition bias.
You may find that whether it is love or family affection, the character and three views formed in the original family and the growth process will have a profound impact on future life.
We advocate freedom. No matter how many different voices there are, the basic principle is to respect everyone’s way of life, seek common ground while reserving differences, and not disturb the happiness of others.
